Day 13 Part 2 “Nice To Meet You”

See Part One here:

black suit

The next morning started as any other spring morning, birds singing, the rustling of leaves on the trees as squirrels played back and forth.  But I couldn’t escape the feeling that this morning was really different.  I know that breaking up with Kevin and moving out was no small feat, but I still felt that there was something else.  It was like a heavy burden had been lifted off my shoulders.  I had been carrying around with me the feelings of betrayal, wondering if it was as apparent on my face as it was in my heart.
Mired in guilt I couldn’t help but wonder was it something that I was or wasn’t doing that would cause him to stray?  I decided to take the day off and sleep in this morning.  There would be plenty time for planning my next move, plenty of time for self analysis.  
Today I was going to lay here in my bed and be comforted in the fact of being home with my family and no one was going to hurt me again.  I woke up later that morning to my parents gone to work.  Feeling kind of hungry I decided to make myself some breakfast; toast, bacon, eggs and coffee and sat down to read the newspaper.  Macy’s was having a two day spring sale and who doesn’t love a little retail therapy- it should do me good. And since it was a weekday the mall wouldn’t be too crowded and I wouldn’t have to see a lot of people, I could take my time and browse.  
Upon arriving to the mall there was a parking space right up front which is good because I wouldn’t have to remember where I parked this time.  I browsed through a few departments – tried on shoes, looked at jewelry and hand bags (my weakness) but nothing grabbed my fancy.  Isn’t it always true when you have all the time in the world and money to shop you never find anything; but anytime you’re in a hurry or have no money and you see everything you want?  
Since the retail therapy was turning out to be a little disappointing and it was lunch time I went to the food court.  But it felt weird dining alone. Felt like everyone in the food court knew what happened yesterday, knew that I had just broken up with my fiancé and moved out.  As people passed by with their trays of cheap fast food I could feel their pity, even from those that flashed a forced smile at me.  
This was more than I could bear, I had kept it together up until this point but, I wasn’t prepared for the reality that just hit me. Would I ever date again?  Would I find someone else, or worse would I ever put my heart out there again, unguarded and exposed to another man?
As I sat there staring at my Bourbon chicken and plantains suddenly my appetite was gone, but not wanting to waste food I packed it up to take home for later.  The mall was not providing me with the distraction that I needed so I left and headed home.  Driving down the street I turn on the radio in hopes of drowning out my thoughts but the DJ on 97.5 was playing song after song about broken hearts or broken trust; I might as well had been listening to a country music or a blues station.  
This was downright depressing.  I needed a quick pick me up.  All of sudden I remembered that there was a park about six miles from my parents house and decided to go there and sit at the pond, feed the ducks and try to read the book that I started a week ago.  Maybe with any luck I just might finish it this time.  As the sun was turning blood orange and playing peek a boo behind thin patches of clouds, I tried to stay focused; tried to at least comprehend what I was reading but, I found myself repeating the same paragraph over and over again.  
There was going to be no easy way around it, I was going to have to force myself to have fun; insist upon enjoying my own company.  Where is it written that we women are no one without a man, can’t we be happy with ourselves or by ourselves?  The more I thought about it the more it became clear that this was going to take some getting used to.   
A few feet away was a couple of vending machines, the kind that you can buy food to feed the ducks with so I dug in my purse and found a few quarters and bought enough crackers that if I paced myself I could feed the ducks for at least an hour or so.  Damn! Even the ducks reminded me of my broken heart.  Have you ever watched a family of ducks in a pond?  
They follow each other in dominant order; male, female then ducklings all looking out for each other, one big happy family.  I gave the rest of the crackers to a little boy and his mom to feed the remaining ducks.  As I was riding home daylight gave way to twilight and the sky was cast in a beautiful shade of deep blue with sparkling lights scattered about.  It was a perfect spring night.  
Perfect of course for lovers going for long walks holding hands and professing their love for one another.  Back at my new home I settled in to a movie and popcorn with my mom; a comedy because Lord knows I needed a good laugh.   Sunday mornings at my parents meant church and this Sunday wasn’t going to be any different.   
I had two options; exercise my independence and declare that I’m grown and don’t want to go and risk being laughed at (some independence as I’m sleeping in my childhood bed) or go quietly.  Who knows going to church might be just what I needed.  Remembering that most of my things were still packed in boxes, my choices of appropriate church going clothes were limited.   
Okay we’re here and I’m sitting on the middle of this hard wooden bench; I know they call them pews but it feels like a hard wooden bench to me.  Anyway I’m half listening to the preacher and my mind can’t help but wonder off.  Now I know people come to church to hear the word of God, and to meditate or just rejuvenate their souls, but I couldn’t help but notice this strikingly handsome, fine specimen sitting a couple of rows in front of me. 
You know the type; Calvin Klein underwear model, or Ralph Lauren cologne model.  couldn’t wait for the preacher to give everybody permission to walk up and hug a complete stranger and give them a little squeeze all in the name of “passing the peace”.  
I was counting down the seconds and before I get to 30 everyone jumped to their feet started moving about the sanctuary in a hurry.  Now you are supposed to hug as many people as you can in a five minute time span, except I wasn’t interested in greeting or hugging anyone else.  I was only looking for the underwear model that I had seen only moments earlier. 
It was easier to see him when everyone was seated and I guess I wasn’t the only one trying to get a hug from him because by the time I got to him there was line five deep; all trying to fill their wait time with a quick “bless you” to someone standing near so as not to seem like a line of teenage groupies.  Some of us it appeared were well over 40 years old. Finally, it was my turn.  
I pressed my cheek to his and said in my most sultry voice “ good morning, it’s so nice to meet you” and when we separated  and looked into each other’s eyes I couldn’t help but feel like he really meant for me to have a good morning and that he had enjoyed our brief encounter as much as I did.  
Reality check; Pastor Williams chides us for passing the peace a little too long and motions for the choir to sing a selection that would keep everyone in an upbeat cheerful spirit.  With the choir singing a joyful noise in the background I’m busy remembering the scent of cologne that Mr. Boxer briefs (mean Michael) was wearing.  
It’s only been a few days since I broke up with Kevin but, it has been months since I felt intrigued by a man, especially a man who normally wouldn’t fit the mold as my “type of man”.  had been partial to business types; you know average height, average build, above average intellect; basically boring men with secure boring jobs.  But there was something refreshing about Michael’s look.  
His chiseled features, athletic build that you could see through his very nice designer suit.   The fact that he was in church all by himself made him even more interesting.  How many single men do you see in church without being part of a prison ministry or as the choir director?  
I’m glad my mother talked me into going to church today saying it would lift my spirits and make me feel better.  I have to admit she was right.   
The little bit of sermon I managed to hear in between my day dreaming about this new mystery man was soothing and the gospel music didn’t hurt either.  This day was turning out to be pretty good after all.  
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8 responses to “Day 13 Part 2 “Nice To Meet You”

  1. Alright, India. You got me GOOD. I loved that what I thought was going to happen (TWICE) didn’t happen. I envisioned ‘Kevin’ at the mall with a new beau or strolling through the park hand-in-hand with another MAN (my twisted imagination). LOL!

    VERY good writing, lady!!! I loved the suspended ending…can’t wait for the story to be complete. 😀

    ~ Angela

    Like

      • 😀 So glad I could inspire you in some way. I’m sure you would do such a twist GREAT justice!

        Like

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